Saturday, June 6, 2009

Joe's Pizza: Broomall, PA

Name: Joe's Pizza
Website: (none)
Type: Restaurant
Location: Broomall, PA
Occupancy: Multiple
Porcelain: Two toilets, two urinals

Joe's is one of the few hidden gems in Broomall. It's "diner style" in the sense that you can get just about anything there, and most of it is pretty good (although, the wings use this really creepy sauce, don't get them). They make a surprisingly good grilled cheese, and their hoagies are one of the only places that stay away from "really tough roll syndrome". Alright then, what about the "head"?

This bathroom was plain old NOT clean. I had to use the second stall, as the first one was ... clogged. Puddles galore on the ground, too. Yuck.
Result: FAIL (no points)

It's a mixed bag looking for privacy here. On one hand, Joe's uses the rare "double door" method, which is an amazing way to really stay separate from where people are eating. On the other hand, the urinals have absolutely NO protection around them, are right next to the sink (we're talking inches), and are visible immediately when you open the second door. Gonna have to go middle-of-the-road.
Result: NO DECISION (0.5 points)

The flushing worked, which is a good thing. The clogged stall appeared to have a paper towel in the toilet, so I can't really fault the owners for the issue.
Result: PASS (1 point)

People have to learn that paper towels are not enough. This place uses a really strange "crank" dispenser, which I find frustrating and gross. It's bad enough using a lever dispenser that everyone has touched, but at least you can work that with your elbow or something. They also have a perpetually empty "pull down from this tiny hole" dispenser in the wall.
Result: FAIL (no points)

One lame, tiny mirror that shows everyone who comes in everything else in the bathroom. Completely stupid.
Result: FAIL (no points)

I think music is asking too much out of such a humble place, but unfortunately that still means zip/zero/zilch.
Result: FAIL (no points)

Reviewer Tilt
And now, for the most fun I have ever had giving Tilt points. The soap dispenser in here was ... wait for it ... an AUNT JEMIMA BOTTLE! WHAT?! This really isn't a good thing persay, but I laughed so hard that I had to mention it and have a little mercy.
Result: 0.5 points

Score: 2.0 out of 7 (28.6%)

What This Means For You:
Sorry Joe's, but I just can't recommend your bathroom to people. Everyone should know, though, that this rest room used to be substantially MORE gross. Too bad they haven't made the right kinds of improvements. The food is still great, and the restaurant itself is clean and pleasant, but definitely hold it until you get home.

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